Computer Aging with Bill Maher

What is it in Corn Pops that requires...

A metal bag?

There's such a fine line...

Between pretty and hideous.

No matter what you may think...

Ryan Seacrest is damn good at his job.

Twenty bucks.

Says the chubby brunette wins America's Next Top Model.

Are you a terrible person...

If you use those address labels without donating to cystic fibrosis?

Either Marisa Tomei & Debi Mazar eat babies...

Or 42 looks a lot better than it used to.

The Oscars reminded me...

I'm totally going gay when I get old.

Is it racist to say the black chicks on American Idol are way better than the white ones?

Because they are.

Wasn't the Milk Board doing this bit...

Long before Perez Hilton?

Sorry, Sarah Paulson...

It seems your moderate looks, bad comic timing and sibilant S's will have to find a new home on TV.

I, for one, can't wait!

Dannielynn's Suicide Countdown

16y:302d:4m:32s

Dear Hipsters,

Please stop seeing shitty movies ironically. They'll only make more of them.

Well, it worked for Natalie Portman.

"And I'm as pretty as she is.... Right?

...Y'all???"

Dear U.S. Mint,

Stop it. Just stop it.

Happy Valentine's Day

To all the happy couples out there.

Of all the things I could die without ever seeing...

This is number one on the list.

I still can't figure out...

Who the hot one is.

Ralph Nader:

Fucking Democrats up since 1996.

Anna Nicole Smith's death:

I blame TrimSpa.

Because Space Cowboys was already taken?

Who could've guessed a year ago...

Volkswagen would still be sticking with their "Un-Pimp My Ride" ad campaign today?

Comedy Theorem

30 Rock + Tina Fey > SNL - Tina Fey

Therefore, Tina Fey is at least somewhat awesome.

Thanks a lot, Oscars

Now I have to see THIS.

How did MadTV not do this stupid sketch?

What happened in the days following Princess Diana's death....to Elton John.

Kyra Sedgwick winning a Golden Globe for The Closer:

Further proof that foreign critics can't recognize a TERRIBLE Southern accent.

It's a lot better than you'd expect.

So who will be...

The third cartoon creator to die this month?

Why is "economy size" small in cars...

But big in candy?

People Paula says:

Worst Movie of 2006 - The Fountain

Most Overrated Movie of 2006 - The Queen

Weirdest Movie of 2006 - Pan's Labyrinth


Best Movie of 2006 - (God, I Hope I Haven't Seen It Yet...)