Wednesday, June 06, 2012

If people say you can't make it through life being tardy....


Point out that those who were late to work survived 9/11.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Hey Nordstrom, thought you should know....


Putting your XL and XS models side-by-side on your website makes all your clothes look crappy.

Tuesday, December 07, 2010

"Yo momma so poor....



"She had a $1 yard sale
and made money on everything she owned."


PeoplePaula-ism of the Day:

"Hey, did you get the new Kanye album yet? I hear it's....



THE GOOD SHIT LOLLIPOP."

Friday, November 26, 2010

I was disappointed to find out....



That I will not, in fact, be taught anything about
W.E.B. Du Bois today.


Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Pizza or Prayer?



Not a lot to do in Annapolis, Maryland.

Friday, June 11, 2010

Dear Girls:




Please stop trying to do things "just as good as the boys" and failing. You're embarrassing the rest of us.

Friday, June 04, 2010

The Daily Show has finally jumped the shark:



Of course, by jumped I mean hired and by shark I mean Olivia Munn.


Saturday, May 22, 2010

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Hey Kleenex,



The environment wanted me to tell you that you're a real bunch of jerks.

Harvard student caught in web of lies and deceit....



I see an Oscar for Jake Gyllenhaal!

Monday, May 17, 2010

It's gonna be really sad....



When Spencer murders Heidi.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Community & Parks and Recreation:




The Office and 30 Rock of our generation.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Facebook:



Doing Lorne Michaels' job better than Lorne Michaels since 2010.

Monday, April 19, 2010

iPhone Concert Commercial



Isn't this what they're really saying??

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

I wonder who will be this decade's....



Elias Koteas/Christopher Meloni.

Monday, March 08, 2010

Saddest part of the Oscars:



Oprah telling Precious that she has a long career in Hollywood in front of her. You know, because there are so many roles out there for obese black women.

Hey, Far Left....



I don't think so.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Thanks, Plastic Surgery!

The "Golden Girls" were 62, 63, 51 & 63....



Which are how old Loni Anderson, Suzanne Somers, Jennifer Tilly and Jaclyn Smith are now.


Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Hey Comedy Central,


Maybe it's not the best idea to air the Artie Lange stand-up special "Jack & Coke" right after the alcoholic drug addict tried to stab himself to death.

Just a thought.